Note: this blog is not funny at all.
So, from what I heard, Nessie Knoll died one year and one day ago. And it has hit me hard. It has hit me extremely hard. Partly because she is the first person that I've actually had some kind of connection with that has died. But I think it's mostly because I respected her so much when she was alive.
I just got back from a walk around the block. I saw my friend's status on Facebook saying that Nessie Knoll died a year and a day ago, and immediately I started crying. I don't mean like a few tears. I mean BAWLLLLINNNN! Ok sorry but seriously tears were shooting from my face like a waterslide. I could not stop the tears from coming. I had friends over, so I decided to take a walk, and along my walk, I was making noises I had not heard myself make in my entire life. Noises of pure, 100% grief. And I thought "Why is this happening? I hardly knew Nessie!"
I hardly knew her. Maybe the problem is exactly that. She's gone, and I hardly knew her. I went to Del Dayo elementary school with her for 6+ years, and still I can honestly say I hardly knew her. I think that's part of the problem. I'm crying because I will never ever get a chance to know her. I've seen her facebook photos, and she seems like a really cool person. She does gymnastics, and from what I saw of her in elementary school, she had amazing potential. Were she alive today, I am sure she would be in the olympics some day.
But she's not. She's gone. Which horrifies me. What if I die before I achieve what I know I'm capable of? She had so much potential, and neither she nor the world got to see what she can achieve. It's horrible. And that is why I'm tearing up as a write this. All right, tearing up is an understatement. I have literally wiped off my keyboard 3 times since writing this.
So I'm crying. I wish the world could see her amazing potential. The worst part is, I imagine how her best friends feel. Those people who trusted her, who could confide in her anything. And all of a sudden that amazing feeling of trust and companionship is gone forever, and there is nothing they can do to get it back. I can't even imagine how that feels, and I never, ever want to experience it. So, best friends of Nessie, if you are reading this, I am sincerely sorry for the horrible loss you have experienced. I hardly knew her, and tears are streaming from my face, so I can't imagine what it's like for you. I wouldn't wish this pain on anybody. I'm sorry if this made it worse, I just felt like I needed to express how I felt, since a few people were staring at me strangely for crying right after a party.
This may not be the best blog ever, but it's the best I could do, and I hope it does justice to the wonderful person that was Nessie Knoll. The world misses you, and hopefully your soul gets reincarnated in the form of Michael Phelps. You honestly deserve it. Also, Happy 21st birthday. I wish that you were here to celebrate it, but I promise you, I took a shot in your honor.
R.I.P. Nessie Knoll
