Well, it’s 6:18 AM, I’m still awake, and I feel a little
delirious. If I’m being honest, I just want to write to see what will come out
of this lil tweaked out mind right now. So go ahead brain, do your thing. You
know? YOU KNOW?
All right, yall, let’s hit it. First of all, screw essays. No, actually. Ok this may sound a little weird, buuuuut… I like writing essays! I said it. I’m not afraid to admit it anymore. I’m thinking about going FB official with essays, but she essaid that she’s not ready for the commitment. I said, “What’s wrong, ese?” and she said “I just don’t think of you that essway.”
Essay puns! You ever think about the fact that “friend zone” rhymes with “end zone?” That’s weird, because being in the endzone is awesome, cuz you either just scored a touchdown or you’re using a dirty euphemism. BUT being in the friend zone is worse than having scalding hot knives shoved down your throat while crocodiles nibble at your genitals.
I think in football, they should replace the “end zone” with the “friend zone.” It would be the same rules. Every time you get into the friend zone you get 6 points, but then for the rest of the game, a really attractive girl will follow you around complaining about her boyfriend, wishing she could “just find somebody nice.” That way, when you get a touchdown, you win the game, but do you really win? Really? You may have scored, but you’re not gonna score. WHOOOOAAAAAA! Boom shaka laka, yall!
Boom shaka laka?
I believe it’s time for bed.
One more thing. Chapstick is a name brand lip balm, BUT how did they come up with that name? I like to think that way back in the 1800’s, during cowboy times, when men wearing leather chaps wasn’t gay, there was a monster. It would get inside your chaps and eat away at your skin. It was called “the chaps tick.” Then, a brilliant man by the name of Jaison DeQuanda (I don’t know who invented chapstick, but I’m assuming that was his name) invented a special moisturizer that you could put on your legs after the chaps tick did his dirty work. It was called “chaps-tick-stick.” Then, in another brilliant marketing move, they invented a superbug to combat the evil chaps tick. He would eat chaps-tick-stick and track down the chaps tick, and kill him with chaps-tick-stick. He was called the Chaps-tick-stick-tick. His name was Rick. However, soon he realized his own potential, and started squirting his chaps-tick-stick into tubes and selling it. And that’s the story of how Chapstick started!
Good night everyone!
It’s still technically dark, don’t judge me.
All right, yall, let’s hit it. First of all, screw essays. No, actually. Ok this may sound a little weird, buuuuut… I like writing essays! I said it. I’m not afraid to admit it anymore. I’m thinking about going FB official with essays, but she essaid that she’s not ready for the commitment. I said, “What’s wrong, ese?” and she said “I just don’t think of you that essway.”
Essay puns! You ever think about the fact that “friend zone” rhymes with “end zone?” That’s weird, because being in the endzone is awesome, cuz you either just scored a touchdown or you’re using a dirty euphemism. BUT being in the friend zone is worse than having scalding hot knives shoved down your throat while crocodiles nibble at your genitals.
I think in football, they should replace the “end zone” with the “friend zone.” It would be the same rules. Every time you get into the friend zone you get 6 points, but then for the rest of the game, a really attractive girl will follow you around complaining about her boyfriend, wishing she could “just find somebody nice.” That way, when you get a touchdown, you win the game, but do you really win? Really? You may have scored, but you’re not gonna score. WHOOOOAAAAAA! Boom shaka laka, yall!
Boom shaka laka?
I believe it’s time for bed.
One more thing. Chapstick is a name brand lip balm, BUT how did they come up with that name? I like to think that way back in the 1800’s, during cowboy times, when men wearing leather chaps wasn’t gay, there was a monster. It would get inside your chaps and eat away at your skin. It was called “the chaps tick.” Then, a brilliant man by the name of Jaison DeQuanda (I don’t know who invented chapstick, but I’m assuming that was his name) invented a special moisturizer that you could put on your legs after the chaps tick did his dirty work. It was called “chaps-tick-stick.” Then, in another brilliant marketing move, they invented a superbug to combat the evil chaps tick. He would eat chaps-tick-stick and track down the chaps tick, and kill him with chaps-tick-stick. He was called the Chaps-tick-stick-tick. His name was Rick. However, soon he realized his own potential, and started squirting his chaps-tick-stick into tubes and selling it. And that’s the story of how Chapstick started!
Good night everyone!
It’s still technically dark, don’t judge me.
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